God's Control

"If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it was and always will be yours. If it never returns, it never was yours."

Maybe this is more of a secular statement, but I find it applying to so much in my life. There is always something we are holding onto. (Whether we admit it or not is a different story...) but there is always a time when we need to just let it go, and allow ourselves to be free of it. Maybe you have heard the verse in Matthew 11 which states

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

But you know, maybe this quote isn't just about the troubles in our lives. It's about the things we love. Sometimes it's easy to say to God, Hey! I give it up, I don't want this anymore. The hard part comes when it's something we LOVE that we don't want to give up.

I have experienced this so many times. There is a lot in my life that I want to hold onto...that I don't want to give up. But I find that when I offer my entire life to God, he blesses it. He chooses what to give, and He chooses what to take away. I need to set it free. He needs to control it. And if what I love comes back to me, it is mine. If it never does...well, I guess it's all in God's hands.

Letting Go

“It’s hard to wait around for something you know might never happen, but it’s even harder to give up when you know it’s everything you want.”

This is my most recent "quote on FB finding". :) A good friend of mine posted that as her status. Now, I don't know what she is going through, but I found that this one specifically has been applied to my life the last week or two.

So much has changed since my last blog. I have seen God's sovereignty place me back at Highland church with MANY new friends that go with me...Faith, Josh, Lacey, Kourtney, Tim, and sometimes Adam-Bob. I have never had so many Christian friends here at the dorms. His simple quiet "Trust me" is beginning to feel more secure in my life.

But, the last month or two has still been tough. It hasn't been since the last 2 or 3 days that I've taken the time to just chill and reflect on His mighty power. Lately I've been too caught up in school, interpreting, and issues. This morning though, as I sit here in bed avoiding a shower, I am beginning to see how far I still am from understanding His beautiful grace. I love that our God is still One in which we need to learn more about everyday.

Anywhos, back to my original quote. It’s hard to wait around for something you know might never happen, but it’s even harder to give up when you know it’s everything you want.

The last week or two has been such a mess. I have succumbed to different temptations, and some mornings I wake up wondering if my best friend will talk to me today. I'll admit, I've been "waiting around" for a lot of things to happen, and I abhor "giving up". But sometimes it's something we MUST do. We must give up some things, especially when it's everything we want. On Friday I took some time to just cry in my bed praying to God and talking with Him. I have been holding on to a lot of different issues, and telling God - I don't want to give it up. It hurts. I know I MUST give it up, but Lord, I want it. Finally I handed it over and said, You know what God? You ARE sovereign. You do know what is going on. I WILL give this into your hands.

Because often I have found that when I "give something up to God", He blesses me with something so much greater. Once again, it's just those soft small whispers that He sends my way:

Trust me. Trust me.
When I act, who can reverse it?

I've been waiting around for a lot of things to happen. But that's what is so beautiful about our God. He knows what's next, we don't. It sucks some days. I have no clue what I'm going to do next with my future. But, I do know one thing. He is in control. And I will wait. Even if it means giving up something that is everything I want...